The book begins with 10 pointers on how not to look like an American woman in Iraq.

"Wear lots of lipstick," is first. "Trade in all silver jewelry for gold," is second. "Don't look happy. Iraqis are suffering," is third.

Jackie Spinner put them in writing but for a while has known them by heart.

They're survival tips she received while reporting for The Washington Post in Iraq, where the threat of kidnapping constantly looms over Western journalists. Luckily, she never learned these tips the hard way during her stints there in 2004 and 2005.

"The hard way is death," Spinner said on the phone from Portland, Ore., where she gave a reading this week from her new book, "Tell Them I Didn't Cry." The 35-year-old journalist and her twin sister will appear for a reading on Monday at Millikin University. Both were raised in Decatur.

The book features the voices of Spinner and her twin, Jenny, a Millikin graduate and now an assistant professor of English at St. Joseph's University in Philadelphia. The journalist tells the gritty and often frightening details of time spent working in the war-torn country; the loved one back home explains the fear in her heart as her close sibling puts herself in harm's way.

"I had the adventure story, the story that people will be mesmerized by but not relate to. Her story is the universal story," Jackie said, adding that Jenny's writing represents the legions of people behind every reporter, contractor or soldier who heads off to war.

It was the first time the sisters worked together as writers.

"I think people are fascinated by Jackie's story, and people are fascinated by twins. That's why (Jackie's) agent really worked on me to be involved in the project," Jenny said. "I enjoyed it, but it wasn't easy because it was hard to read about what she went through."

Jackie spared few details in her story because she felt it was important for readers to understand the effect that war has on a person. Her proud mother, Donna, already has had a lot of feedback to suggest the approach was wise.

"One lady friend called this morning and said she just had a new take on what it must be like to be over there by reading the book and everything that Jackie went through," Donna said, speaking from her Decatur home on Friday morning. Even she learned more about her daughters as she read their work.

But as much as the book is about the hardships of war, it's also about the sisters' close relationship and how the experience of war altered it. They've lost some of their twin-ness from the experience, both agree.

"War is the third person in the room between us," Jenny said.

Post-traumatic stress has been an issue for Jackie, and at times it has been easier for her to talk to war veterans than to her family. On top of that, the reporter misses friends who have become like a second family in Iraq, which still feels as much like home to her as any other place.

She'd still love to return but isn't sure if she should.

"I would have a hard time facing my family and saying I'm going back, knowing what they've been through already," Jackie said.

She hopes instead to find work that is as motivating as her reporting in Iraq, whether that means she stays at the Post, writes more books or moves to Zimbabwe.

For now, she's coming home again.

And as C-SPAN films the Decatur reading for the entire country to see, family, friends and maybe even former teachers will be there to listen live.

Amy Hoak can be reached at ahoak@;herald-review.com or 421-7972.