DECATUR - Crying often is Dad's cue to pass an infant back to his or her mother.

But that's not the kind of father Robert Nagy wants to be after his first child is born in June.

"I want to take care of my baby's needs, not step away," he said. "I want to be part of my child's life from day one."

That's also what the Macon County Health Department wants and, with the help of a $50,000 grant from Circle of Parents, has been offering classes since June, designed to prevent child abuse and strengthen families. Called Real Dads Rock, the free session uses the Conscious Fathering curriculum developed by Parent Trust for Washington Children and covers feeding, burping, sleeping, changing and bathing, swaddling and other comforting techniques.

Twenty-one new or expectant fathers have taken the class, as have 15 new or expectant mothers. Among them are Nagy, 35, Elber and Diana Tejada, ages 31 and 30, and Shawn Horve, 19, all of Decatur, who attended a session Dec. 13 at the health department.

"Men who have confidence in their ability to parent are more likely to do it and do it effectively," said Pam Burkhart, project coordinator for Macon County Safe from the Start and one of the teachers of Real Dads Rock.

"Too often we socialize males to think they don't know what they're doing," she continued. "That's why 72 percent of all shaken babies are shaken by men, and 34 percent are biological fathers."

These sobering statistics came toward the end of a 2½-hour session, co-taught by Alex Wall, that was hands-on and informative. The students practiced what they were learning on a realistic baby doll.

"You can develop a parental balance with the mom so you can be a partner rather than a helper," Wall said. "Each time you change a baby or feed a baby is a great time for bonding."

Sometimes, however, all an infant does is cry - even when rested, full, burped and clean.

Consolation strategies mentioned in class include holding, rocking, talking to the baby and swaddling him or her in a blanket, thus re-creating the security of the womb.

"Find something that works for you and your baby, but whatever you do, they're going to want you to keep doing it," Burkhart said. "So don't do anything you're not willing to continue doing for the next three months at least."

"Like putting baby in the car and driving around the block," Wall said.

When parents or caregivers reach the end of their rope, Burkhart advises them to put the baby someplace safe and leave the child alone until the adults have calmed down.

Judy Gibbs, maternal child health special projects coordinator at the health department, said the plan is for Real Dads Rock to continue after the grant runs out at the end of February by making it a component of existing programs at such places as New Life Pregnancy Center, the health department and Decatur Memorial Hospital.

Gibbs and Burkhart said a Real Dads Rock baby shower is being planned for 11 a.m. to 2 p.m. March 7 at Decatur Memorial Hospital to help give new and expectant fathers the same resources new and expectant mothers receive.

Vincent Rodriguez, executive director of Macon County Court Appointed Special Advocates, helps teach some of the Real Dads Rock classes.

Horve attended the session Dec. 13 session on crutches, he so much wants to be a good father to the daughter he and his girlfriend are expecting April 5. The Tejadas have even less time to wait, with their first child, a boy, due to arrive Feb. 13.

"We really wanted to obtain some guidelines to help us through the amazing world of parenting," Elber Tejada said. "This information doesn't just pop into your head when the baby is born."

tchurchill@herald-review.com|421-7978